How to Make Someone’s Day

or week..

Photo by Nick Fewings on Unsplash

Last week, my week was made by kindness - generosity in unexpected places, from unexpected people; people I don’t know very well, as well as the kindness of friends. I wanted to write about it with a sense of gratitude, acknowledging that such interactions can have much greater impact than the acts themselves.

Some recent poetry acceptances in magazines and anthologies have really cheered me up and boosted my confidence. When you’re feeling low, it can take quite a lot to penetrate the gloom, but this has been a lovely, bright, burst of sunshine.

Last week my writing got an additional boost on social media when a poetry pal (someone I only really know via online poetry events) gave me a mention in a weekly feature run by Broken Spine Arts. I was genuinely flabbergasted and blushed enough to generate some real warmth. The generosity was unexpected and kept me going for the whole week.

At the end of the week, I was asked by someone in the poetry community to host one of the regular events. The fact that they trusted me to do this was huge and added to my already blooming confidence. Next week I may be back to ground zero, but I’ll remember the faith that people showed in me and my writing and it will add to the foundations of building my belief in myself and my work.

I’ve barely sold any art work this year. A lot of art friends have similar tales to tell. I get it. People don’t have spare money to spend on non-essentials; they’re being cautious with what they spend. My art cards usually sell quite well, but so far, year to date, I’ve only had 3 orders. It can be quite depressing, especially when that little bit of extra incomes goes towards putting extra fuel in the car so we can get out and about or buying something we might not be able to afford otherwise (compost or plants) I’m lucky that I have a wee stash of canvases and enough art materials to paint for a good while yet, but if the day comes when I run out, then I won’t be able to afford to replace supplies and that’s definitely a distressing thought. Like my writing, my art has become an important facet of who I am and is something else I can do despite chronic illness and disability.

Social media can be a dismal place to hang out sometimes, but there are a lot of lovely, ordinary people there who are positive and boost eachothers work - artists, poets, photographers. Last week someone boosted my art work on social media and exhorted me to keep painting and keep sharing. It was heartening. It made me feel less like giving up, that there is value to creating and sharing, even if I don’t necessarily sell pieces. I know that’s true, that creativity has inherent value, regardless of whether it’s popular and commercially viable, but it’s sometimes hard to remember that when you’ve not sold anything for a while and the pieces are piling up in the studio (OK, the lounge. The studio still has no windows!)

On Sunday l woke up to an email asking me to submit my art work for sale as part of local art and book festival. I’ve been involved previously with different hats on, but this is the first year my art will be displayed and to say I’m chuffed would be putting it mildly.

On Thursday we arranged to meet up with friends, who we’d not seen since Christmas. We usually take turns in going between each others’ houses, sharing the catering. Since having our wee rescue doggy come to stay, it’s less easy to get out. They can be left for longer periods now, but not a whole evening and we can’t take them to our friends house as they have three dogs of their own who would scare the life out of our wee rescue. In a lovely, practical gesture they offered to bring fish and chips over so that we could all meet up and I didn’t need to cook. It was such a generous and thoughtful thing to do and enabled us to have an evening together without worry.

Last week was an unusual week in that we had two social engagements. Often months can go by without us meeting up with anyone at all. We were invited to some friends in the village for dinner and they let us bring the doggy with us so we didn’t have to leave early or go back and check them. They weren’t brilliantly well behaved, as they’d had a disruptive day anyway - anything out of routine can upset them - but our friends were very accommodating and coped with them trotting backwards and forwards, between the lounge and the kitchen and sticking their nose into things they had no right to (they’re very inquisitive, as everything is a new experience for them). We had an enjoyable evening, despite the added stress of the doggy antics. That simple act of generosity - in letting our dog come with us, despite the potential for things to go wrong - meant we were able to get out when otherwise it wouldn’t have been possible.

The week provided an absolute surfeit of kindness and generosity and I doubt that it will be repeated any time soon, although as I edit this, I’ve just received a bag of flowers seeds in the post. There was no note attached. If you’re reading this and it was you, heartfelt thanks.*

I’m not writing this as a ‘look at me’ post, but as I said at the start, in gratitude to the great and the good who crossed my path last week and chose to say or do something kind, generous and thoughtful. Small acts of kindness can have a big impact on people’s day to day feelings of worth and make them feel valued. We all have this skill of kindness within our gift - let’s give it when we can. It really does make the world a better place.

*Update - the seeds were a Mother’s Day gift. The card had arrived earlier!